Yo dont text me then not text me
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
