can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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