Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
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