Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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