did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Randomize
