Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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