how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
The dick lei will go down in squad history
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
