Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
