she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
