i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
