yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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