i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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