Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
