I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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