I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
