windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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