i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize