what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
