I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
