If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Come see our sink grown plant.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
