I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Randomize
