Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Randomize
