i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
