your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
