Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize