I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
