No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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