Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
