I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize
