She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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