I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
