bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize