Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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