paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
