I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize
