There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
