did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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