im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
