just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
