Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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