Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
