She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
