best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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