It's Friday. Sex?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
