Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
