if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
