haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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