I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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