You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
