Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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