we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
