i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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